This is a very common theme on this site and forum; the decision to end the life of a beloved pet. Sometimes the decision "happens" on its own, and other times, our pet slowly declines, leaving us with lots of time for questions and indecision.
Being in the veterinary profession doesn't make it easier, either. There's always that "what if" chance that tomorrow will be a better day, our pet really isn't that sick, or the appetite will come back. But usually, deep down, we do know when it is time.
I wrote about my long goodbye to one of the best cats ever, my Herman Roosevelt Quinn, in The Twilight Time article. He suffered initially from hyperthyroidism and then kidney failure, and even while his health slipped away, his loving and curious nature did not. It was a hard time of decision for me.
Talking about it helps
Here is a current discussion in the VetMed forum about the difficulty of knowing when it is time to say goodbye to a beloved pet.
DONZI123 writes: "This past weekend she started throwing up, wouldn't eat, lost control of her bowels, and began having neuropathy -- uncontrollable shaking of her hind legs. Oh God, I hated to see her that way. I made the decision -- even after I had just put down Max -- to put Mollie down. I hoped she would stay with me and we could both get used to Max being gone. Did I do the right thing"
Forum Host KAHLUADANES replied: "I had to have my Hailey euthanize back in Nov. Even though I'm a vet tech, it didn't change all the emotions I felt. I understand what you are going through. Allow yourself to grieve don't beat yourself up... you gave your Mollie the ultimate in love... you let her go and be at peace and pain free. You let her go with dignity."
Read more
Readers Respond:
How did you "know" it was time? Can you offer advice for coping with guilt or grief?
Please share your tips here.
Additional Resources for Information and Coping:
Saying Goodbye - Resources for learning about euthanasia, how to know when it is "time," and pet loss and grief
Photo: Herman Roosevelt Quinn by Janet Tobiassen Crosby DVM
Twitter | Facebook | Free newsletter
Comments
Dear Dr. Janet – I read your entries about your beloved Herman. He certainly was a magnificent cat. Later today I am putting down “Miss Paras”, my 20 year old Yorkie, due to heart failure. I’ve had her for two years since she came into Rescue after being pulled from a dumpster in MD. Her birthday photo is on the 8/11/2009 entry of my pet blog http://www.PiddleTails.com I work with “end of life” and “Special Senior” Yorkies, but the pending loss of Miss Paras is hitting me quite hard. I’ve had her for just over two years – much longer than the usual 6 months or less of most of my FurFriends, and she is quite a part of my life. Your entries helped me a bit, and I appreciate your thoughtful writing. Thank you.
Tina Ann Byers
Proud Rescue Yorkie Mommie of Miss Paras (20 – Special Needs), Muffin (18 – Special Needs), Dylan (12 – Special Needs), Tashia (5 – former AR Puppy Mill momma), Gabby (1 – Special Needs) and Liah (1 – Just Special!)
Hello Tina-
Thanks so much for your thoughtful post. I am glad my article could help in some way.
I hope you are doing OK (considering the sad situation) after saying goodbye to “Miss Paras.” It just doesn’t get easier, does it? Even when we know it is “time.”
Thank you for your post. I think each post helps others to learn about ourselves and our pets and the difficulty we all feel in saying goodbye to a loved one.
Janet DVM